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Teen Digital Dating Violence Toolkit

We use technology daily to connect with friends and family, post photos and videos, and find information about health issues, current events, or what’s happening in our community. Increasingly, teens are reporting violence and abuse from current and former dating partners through text messages, social media, and the distribution of nude or semi-nude images without consent. This is called “digital dating violence.”

Digital Dating Violence means physical, sexual, or psychological/emotional violence that occurs between dating partners via texting, social media, and related online mediums. This term is also known as, and will be used interchangeably with, technology-facilitated gender-based violence (TFGBV).

You may not know that digital dating violence is happening to you or to someone you know. It’s OK that you don’t know, but it’s not OK that it’s happening. This toolkit will help you identify whether digital dating violence is happening to you and provides information, tips, and ideas for what to do and what kind of help is available.

What is Teen Digital Dating Violence?
Types of Digital Dating Violence

This section provides helpful information for teens about the most common forms of digital dating violence, including harassment, threats, location tracking, texting and sexting, distribution of nude or semi-nude photos, and online luring and sexual exploitation. It also provides resources that can help.

Harassment

Threats

Location Tracking

Texting and Sexting

Distribution of Nude or Semi-Nude Photos

If you are under 18, this tool can help remove images from Facebook, OnlyFans, Instagram, Pornhub, TikTok, and yubo

Please note that this resource sends you to US-based resources. Please see our Legal Remedies and Preserving Digital Evidence Toolkits for Canadian-based resources.

Online Luring and Sexual Exploitation

Staying Safe Online

No matter what you’re experiencing in your relationships, we want you to be able to continue to use technology in the safest way possible. Here are some resources to help you navigate online spaces.

Safety Planning

Often, the most dangerous time for someone is when they are planning on leaving a violent relationship. The resources in this section provide you with information to strategically use technology in ways that can enhance your safety by creating a safety plan. A safety plan can not only help you strategically think through the steps needed to leave your relationship, but also help to take back some control if you are being stalked, monitored, or abused through a perpetrator’s misuse of technology.

Getting Help

If you or someone you know is experiencing any type of violence in your relationship, there are many people who can help. You may be feeling a variety of different emotions from sadness, anger, shame, embarrassment, or fear about getting in trouble. Know that you are not alone. Finding support early on will very likely result in you feeling less alone. Reach out to a friend, family member, or a safe adult. A safe adult can be a teacher, a coach, or even the parents of a good friend.

Here are some organizations where you can seek support:

  • Kid Help Phone’s crisis line is available 24/7 by call or text
  • Sheltersafe.ca connects you with your local domestic violence shelter and its crisis line. You can phone them for advice, counselling, and safety planning.
Additional Resources

This section provides additional resources that may be helpful for you and your experiences of Teen Digital Dating Violence.

A Note on Language

In this toolkit, we will sometimes use the word woman/women and feminine pronouns for simplicity and to recognize the significant impact technology-facilitated violence has on women and girls. We recognize that TFGBV also impacts trans, non-binary, and Two-Spirit people. We hope that all people impacted by TFGBV will find these documents useful.

Word of Caution

This toolkit is available as read-only on this website with an option to download the PDF versions of each document. If you are reading this toolkit on a device that may be monitored by your abuser, do not download the PDF versions as they will automatically save in your downloads folder. If you think that someone is monitoring your phone, use a different device that the person cannot access (and that they have not had access to in the past), such as a computer at a library or a friend's phone. You can also use sheltersafe.ca to find a shelter/transition house near you to discuss options with an anti-violence worker.

This toolkit was created by Women’s Shelters Canada’s Tech Safety Canada Project and adapted with permission from the BC Society of Transition Houses’ Technology Safety Project.

This toolkit, or any portion thereof, may be reproduced or used as long as acknowledgement is included. If you would like to adapt the content, please contact Women’s Shelters Canada at info@endvaw.ca.